LETS SELL KENYA TO 2CHAINS

Now that 2CHAINS is coming to Kenya, i no longer find the 'he looks like Whoopi Goldberg joke' funny, it's an honor to have such a big star down here. I may not agree with his vocabulary on the female anatomy but i find myself nodding my head to his songs.

Now most of us have been infuriated by the Americans' response to his coming over here,oh well,we have misconceptions about them too,we overrate them and they underrate  us. Retaliating isn't going to cut it, isn't going to have a lasting impact,besides we have 'better' stuff to do online like asking each other 'hio pesa ya referendum in ya mama nani? or consulting on 'how to get guts like the guy who caned baba'.

What we can do though is sell Kenya to 2chains,dont unleash your claws yet,by selling i mean let's show him the real picture of who we are down here,how we do things,this might help reduce the American misconception that Africa is a village and that we all live in the White Masai movie setting.

Allow me, Provoking Eyes, to suggest a recipe of people and events that may help 'sell' Kenya to  2chains, if there is a promoter involved whatsoever, especially from central,he will require a translator, am thinking Bab,the UON student leader is good for the job,on second thought no,Babu's english is from another planet and there might be a comrade nearby ready to throw stones if 2CHAINS seems not to understand Babu.

Let's stick with Grace Msalame,the graceful beauty is a true representation of Africa and  African beauty. Beauty and brains,she definately has to interview him,she should be the official interviewer from the moment he lands,we can give Larry Madowo a second or two with him too.

Throw Mike Sonko into the mix, he got more than two chains on him, and i haven't heard of a senator like him anywhere but Nairobi. Unofficially official,he has his own way of doing things,his constituents are not complaining and i think  2chains would definately come back again if he hanged out with the senator, as long as Sonko doesn't wear the takataka ghasia tshirt. What do you think?

 An hour or two with Shaffie Weru is enough,we are not ready to produce the Hangover 4 movie,Shaffie will definately show 2CHAINS whats hot and whats not in Nairobi, he will show him how we roll.
2CHAINS won't feel like he was in Africa without a little safari, introducing maasailand,take him to the wild and let the most energetic masai's dance for him.

Infact make him a masai warrior give him a spear, a head piece and put some of that red clay on his dreadlocks. Also it would be good to take him to a rescue center where girls have been rescued from early marriages and FGM. Make him an ambassador, a man always feels good to be a knight in shining amour right?
Am thinking we should have a little boy who knows the lyrics to a PG song of the star,a clean version only,have the little boy sing this to the star,he will feel good about it trust me. If that happens please id like to meet the mother of the little boy.

On security matters,if they have to go on a one month training let them, i dont care but security has to be tight,extra tight,very tight. Please introduce a ratchet-o-meter and make sure no one tries to take off his one shoe as i hear they did back then with Sean Paul.

Someone tell the socialites that 2chains has a song about baby mama's,that's incase if one of them is interested and think they can succeed being his. Well,you have nothing to loose socialite,his purse will affect your pulse.Plus child support and everything,that's foreign taxes for Kenya.

 He definately has to meet the artistes down here,its up to them to show him what they got and Caligraph can show him that we got accents like they do too. We got good artistes down here and how they interact with him musically will determine whether he will spread word to his equally great artiste friends back there.

 Which could mean a lot for you artistes,i know you know what i mean am just emphasising the importance.
Kenya is a beautiful country with beautiful unique people and we cant wait for 2CHAINS to land here so we can show him who we are.

I dont expect you all to agree with me on this post,infact if i get only positive comments, i will know that my message has been misunderstood, also because most of the people on the Forbes list agree that if everyone
agrees with your ideas then they are definately stupid and well i want to be on the Forbes list.

Meanwhile,let me go consult with a doctor about kidneys,incase 2chains loves Kenya and Beyonce hears that Kenya is a great place and she decides to come. I just might sell my kidney if that happens. Hope you managed to get a giggle out of this post.
Love and Light,
Provoking Eyes.